LAT Reporting On Israel

LAT-Early has a hillarious (unfortunately) parody of the LA Times rules on reporting about Israel. Check out the article for the full text.

LOS ANGELES TIMES REPORTER’S HANDBOOK:
National Desk, Palestine Dateline

Welcome to the Los Angeles Times National Desk! Your assignment is the Palestine dateline. You will find yourself right at home here, if you can follow these simple rules:

RULE ONE: The word “terrorist” should be applied to people and groups who carry out deliberate non-military attacks against civilians, in places such as America, Europe, the Philippines, and most everywhere else. But not in Israel.

RULE TWO: Never mention failed attempts to carry out a suicide bombing.

RULE THREE: The Palestinian leadership’s failure to meet their responsibilities under the road map must never be mentioned.

RULE FOUR: Israeli compliance with its responsibilities of the road map must not be mentioned. Only nitpicking of Israeli failures is allowed.

RULE FIVE: The unhindered operation of militant groups must be accepted by Israel as a fundamental part of the peace process, but any attacks on these groups by Israel are a violation of the process. Anything Israel does to defend itself beyond passively waiting for the next attack is “provocative.”

RULE SIX: No matter what goes wrong, it was Ariel Sharon’s fault.

RULE SEVEN: No matter what the situation is, it could be improved if Israel would just make more concessions.

RULE EIGHT: Don’t mention that Hamas is completely opposed to the peace process and to Israel’s existence.

RULE NINE: The subject of political education of Palestinians is not an uncontroversial one.